i woke up this morning after an enjoyable 9:30. when you have class and work six days a week, sundays really are a breath of fresh air. although it's probably most beneficial to try and get as much as you can do in the one day you have free, sometimes it's just better to mosey on through the day. that's what i did.

liz and i got together this afternoon to study for our upcoming exam on tuesday. and then my heart broke.

when i stayed with hannes and his parents in january i really grew to love them and they hold a very dear place in my heart. they will forever be my friends and i appreciate all that they did for me when i was at my lowest. it was never openly discussed with me, but i knew that hannes' mom had been sick in the past. with what, i never knew. today liz told me that she had lung cancer a couple of years ago. everything had been fine leading up to just recently. she passed away on thursday. and i feel so bad. they are the greatest people and they didn't deserve this.

i last talked to helmut and angelika in august. i never would have guessed that it would have been my last. i actually haven't had to deal with death that much in my lifetime yet, but oh my god, it's awful. life is full of unexpected surprises and complications. this is a setback. and right now a good cry feels so good.